three promises

It was the first nice Saturday of the year and we were doing yard work at my favorite place in the whole world - gramma’s house. Our parents were there with my sister and her family to help us clean up the yard before summer. We cut back all the dried clematis vines from the previous year from the gazebo my gramma loved so much. We swept the floors and cleared the cobwebs. We pulled weeds and tall, unruly grass. And when we were done and he followed me into the gazebo and got down on one knee, my heart stopped. It still stops when I think about it. Before he asked me the question I’d been waiting to hear my whole life, he asked me to promise him three things:

1.     That I will love him for the rest of my life. This little statement carries a lot of weight. How can you know that you’ll love someone forever – emotions can be so fickle. But that’s the problem! We (especially us girls) can’t “follow our hearts” like we’ve seen in every Disney movie we’ve ever watched. That is NOT what real love is. I heard this recently in a sermon about marriage: “Biblical love is an act of the will accompanied by emotion that leads to action on behalf of its object.” Those actions are by no means void of emotion, but they are not lead by emotion either. You know what that means? Love is a CHOICE! I know that I will love him for the rest of my life because I will choose to. And lucky for me, he makes it easy.

2.     That if I ever start to become bored in our marriage, I will talk to him about it. No matter what you’ve heard, love isn’t all you need - communication is key. If there’s something wrong, you have to talk about it. You cannot fix something if your spouse doesn’t even know it’s broken. No matter how big or small your issue might be, talk. it. out.

3.     That no matter what, we will stick it out. These days, marriage is entered into much too lightly. People get in knowing that they can get out. Prenuptial agreements decide the terms of your divorce before your marriage even begins! I know there will be times when we’ll struggle, but we are starting to finish. And we will give God all the glory.

And of course, we he finally did get around to asking me to marry him, I couldn’t wait to say yes. It was easily the best day of my life…

Father God, I pray that I will always choose to honor these promises. Thank You for placing people in my life who can help keep me accountable. And again, thank You that Your plan for my life includes Nate. I pray that our marriage will always be an example of Your love for the church. I love you. Amen.

deep breaths

I had a small panic attack this morning when I realized there are only 80 days until I marry the man of my dreams. It’s not the man-of-my-dreams part that I worry about (seriously girls, he’s amazing), but the measly 80 days I have left to plan the big day.

When we got engaged back in March, we made all (well, most) of the big decisions rather quickly. Church – check; reception venue – check; photographer – check; dress – check check. It has been the incredible volume of small decisions that threaten to overwhelm me. What kind of dishes should we use? What color tablecloths do we buy? Are there any chairs on the planet that I'll actually like? How many tables can we fit in the barn while also giving them enough room to breathe? My biggest problem is that if I’ve attempted to answer these questions at all, typically the answer is very general and it’s stored only in my brain. If you know me well, you know that is not a reliable place.

As I attempt to answer every possible wedding related question known to womankind and catch up on my unintentional procrastination (I have plenty of time, right?), I am also endeavoring to take deep breaths and remember that while the details are important, the most important thing is that I get to marry the most amazing man I’ve ever known. (Seriously, how did I ever get so lucky?)

Father God, thank You so much for Nate. He is more than I could have ever hoped for and I am so thankful that You made him just for me. Help me to always remember that our marriage is more important than our wedding. Help us to choose to love, encourage, and support each other no matter what life brings. Thank You, God, for Your many blessings. I love You. Amen.